It's the little things...

Today was not different than any other day. A Monday. A Saturday. They are all the same. For the exception of Sundays when my husband is not working. For months I struggled with the 'point' of my days. Don't get me wrong. I love being a mother and caring for my children. But there comes a time when you've changed enough diapers, fed enough bottles, wiped enough tears, read "The Little Red Train" a million times, sung "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" a billion times (counting all the times I sang it when pregnant), that you have to ask yourself, "God, isn't there more to this than THIS?"

My boys are soon to be 6 months old on the 30th of this month. I said to myself today, "Wow, I have made it through 1/2 a year!!" If you asked me if I thought this was possible my first week home I would have certainly said "HELL NO!" This is the time when they start getting real fun. Watching their two completely different personalities evolve.

Braylon is a Mommy's boy. He is the shy one, flirty, and loves to snuggle. He gets scared easily and doesn't like loud noises. He is such a people watcher as takes all his surroundings in. I love how he stares at me like he's never seen me before. He watches every move, every word I say and when I look at him, he has a big grin and acts bashful by turning his head, batting his eyelashes. I do not dare walk out of his sight when he is fixated on me for he throws a fit.

Logan is the complete opposite. He is always on the move. He can not stay still for a single minute. He is loud and the center of attention. He knows it too. He loves loud music and he wants things just the way he wants them. He is very determined. I love his smile. His entire face lights up, his eyes get so wide, and his dimples..oh I love his dimples. When I put my face close to his, he gets so excited that his legs and arms are going a mile a minute. He screeches and laughs while studying every part of my face in awe of me.

They are getting so big and have their own little person personalities. So I ask myself again, "what the point of my days are?" Well that is easy to answer, now anyways. To watch these two little guys grow and learn. To take in every moment and cherish for today will never be tomorrow. To change that diaper with a smile because before I know it, they will be fighting over the bathroom. To make that bottle extra warm because before I know it, they will be eating out my house. To kiss those tears away because one day I will be needing my tears kissed away for they will move away to start their own families. I will read "The Little Red Train" a million more times because sooner or later they will be "too big" for stories. I will also sing as many songs as I can because they will only be my sweet little babies for so long...

Now, I think I know my answer. Yes there is more to it than "this". I just needed to look further and enjoy.